So here we are on a quarantine order for another month and to be honest, I estimate 3-6 months because frankly, some people don’t understand what social distancing is. Anyway, I came here on an attempt to “create through” but I would be lying if I didn’t first express how the coronavirus is affecting my creative process. Yes, I am aware that I have more time to do things I didn’t have time to do before, and it’s amazing in theory, but truthfully, how am I supposed to get things done when I’m crippled with the uncertainty of this disease that is sweeping the globe? Being worrisome compromises the space I need to flow creatively and I have to be honest about that.

I had a breakdown this weekend. Yep. I cried. Why? Because I am scared, I am sad and I am concerned. I think about my family (who I’m not with right now) and I hope they stay safe and healthy. I also think about my friends and their families and I hope they are safe and healthy also. I think about all the essential workers, from grocery store workers to healthcare professionals that are risking their lives to help save ours. I think about families not able to be together in times of need and that just doesn’t sit right with me. Let’s not forget the people who have also lost their jobs because of this.

Maybe some of you are feeling this way too. If you are, you are not alone. I am recognizing this emotion, sitting with it for a little while and letting it go. That isn’t to say the feeling won’t come back, worsen or intensify in the coming weeks. I just know that I am not a robot and I feel things that affect me in ways that have completely overwhelmed me lately.

This isn’t a post to undermine or to invalidate anyone who is able to flourish during the extra time they are gaining from this. I think it’s great to be able to be preoccupied with other things and to make the best out of the situation. In fact, it’s incredibly healthy. I also enjoy seeing everyone come together in the social media space and build a bigger sense of community during this time. That’s comforting. I just wanted to highlight the fact that this pandemic is affecting us in a multitude of ways and I want to point out that it’s okay to not be okay during this time. I acknowledge that I am having a difficult time hitting the ground running in this new way of life (for the foreseeable future), but I plan to get back on track. 

I am sharing some things that I miss while in quarantine because a few of these things were a form of my self-care. That shift has made me a little more vulnerable to the reality of this pandemic so maybe me verbalizing what I miss specifically helps me cope? I don’t really know. I’m throwing darts in the dark here. I miss hiking. If any of you know me, you know that hiking is my jam. It’s the only thing that keeps me sane, grounded and active all at once. Now that I can’t do it, it’s harder to relieve stress from other things going on around me. Walking outside is a supplement but trust me it isn’t the same. I miss the spa. I didn’t frequent the spa too much but a facial every few months helped me put my best face forward and I was due for another. I also miss my nail services and whew chilaaay, I will definitely need some TLC when we are back in business. I guess press-ons will do for now.

I miss creating outside content and shooting with photographer friends. Some of the purest, funniest moment happen on those shoots. I miss brunch and I miss hugs (simp! jk). When I see y’all, you will receive the biggest hug from me okay! I miss attending live concerts and parties. I missed a Snoh Aalegra concert I’d been trying to see for the past 6 months. I was either out of town or it was sold out. When I finally got my hands on some tickets coronavirus said, “not on my watch!” It just wasn’t in the cards I suppose, but live music is also my jam. I miss travel. I had a few planned trips I had to cancel and my summer trip is still up in the air, but so is everything else.

It’s okay to miss these things and be sad that you can’t do them right now. The most important thing to remember is this too shall pass. We are doing what needs to be done to protect the most vulnerable and that’s really the only solace I find in all of this.

Stay safe my friends.

xoxo Lipstickcoco